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Urge the partner to come into counseling or go alone.There may be a possible course of action s/he did not think of. She or he can accept the situation and enjoy what satisfaction the relationship does provide. The unhappy one can force the issue by issuing an ultimatum.I always ask what reasons they give themselves or their mate for their refusal.What follows are a few I have heard more than once. “I’m just not interested in sex any more.” Man or woman, I ask first about hormonal issues.
Very few if any couples manage to retain the original charge of new love and lust. One hopes that what takes its place is a comfortable love and sexual relationship that is richer than the original.When there is no sex within a marriage or a romantic relationship the couple will sometimes consult me together, but most often it is just one of them.